I'm always late, but it's not my fault!

Yesterday, I was sure we'd be on time for preschool. The boy was clean, fed, dressed (except for socks and shoes, but I knew where they were, so THAT wasn't a problem), and just calmly watching Sesame Street until time to go.

30 minutes before time to leave, I asked him to put on the shoes. I asked him again 5 minutes later, and 5 minutes after that... (at one point, he said, "Stop nagging at me!"). At 5 minutes before time to leave, I went over to help him as he had one sock on (upside down) and was struggling with the other. He was writing on the floor in frustration. I fixed the socks, and we went to work on the shoes. But the shoes weren't tight enough. After struggling with the shoes for ten minutes, we got them "just right." Then he had to go to the bathroom again.

The toddler chose this time to release toxic waste into her diaper. I briefly considered leaving her in the dirty diaper because we were already late, but I couldn't do that. As soon as the diaper was off, she ran giggling. I finally tackled and re-diapered her.

I ask myself why in God's name I had 3 children, then remember that the oldest wasn't even there to annoy me.

We got in the car and left. We were 15 minutes late for his 2 hours and 45 minute preschool day. It takes 20 minutes to get back home without traffic. The toddler is asleep in her carseat. I may as well just sit here in the parking lot and read.

This is my life.